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The Hard Part of Waiting

February 12, 2010

As a little girl, I grew up listening to the Annie soundtrack (let’s try to forget that it was on 8 track, I don’t want to date myself). Lately, I have found myself thinking about a song that Annie sings “Maybe”. The setting is in the window sill of the orphanage, and the lyrics go something like this:

Betcha they’re good
Why shouldn’t they be,
Their only mistake
was giving up me….

So maybe now its time
and maybe when I wake
They’ll be there calling me “baby”
Maybe.”

The song goes on, singing of what she thinks her parents are like and ends with all the orphans singing:

“So, maybe now this prayers
the last one of its kind
Won’t you please come get your,
“Baby”…….Maybe

The reality of waiting has begun to hit me. And the truth is, I haven’t really even started. While the excitement of adoption, and the hope that it brings is there, there is also an underlying sorrow.

There is sorrow in the circumstance that brought her parents or family to an orphanage. I ache for her Mother and Father who have had to make this choice. I ache for myself who yearns to have her here. I ache for my daughter, that she might not suffer any longer.

I wonder if she has ever known the comfort of a Mother’s arms, the safety of a Daddy tucking her in at night, or the house full of laughter that siblings bring.

I wish I could let her know that world isn’t as big as it seems. That even though we are miles apart, we stare at the same moon. All I can do is wait, and pray she knows that I am waiting to call her “baby”.

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5 comments

  1. I am enjoying your posts, especially since I love you and your family so much. You know that I here with y’all every step of the way.

    Annie Arkins would be cute.


  2. Tears! Love you and your family-so glad to be on this journey with you!


  3. Hi Jennifer,

    We are at about the same point you are in this crazy adoption paperwork process. We too are adopting a girl from Ethiopia through Gladney and I always enjoy checking in on your blog. We haven’t entered the blog world yet, but I’m sure it’s coming soon. Thanks for sharing yourself and your thoughts. I hope we can keep in touch over the next many months and I’ll be wishing you a speedy trip to the official wait list. Thanks again! Michelle


  4. this entire blog has reached deep in my heart. All the best for this gorgeous family.
    all my love.


  5. All snotty now. I love you.



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